Starting at the bottom

Many people would suggest that Nigel Farage is a real pain in the backside.

The BBC appears to agree with them.

Touching news

As found in the Derry Journal, here's a plan which will create a cleavage of opinion.

@alistaircoleman

Trick or treat

Thanks to Jon C for sending in this article from the online version of The Daily Telegraph about the recent rise in so-called sextortion cases.

As the article says, these cases involve the intended victim being approached online by an attractive young woman who engages in explicit conversation until the victim is caught on camera performing a sex act.

According to The Telegraph, a treat is then in store.

Bizarre bazaar

Seems a little unfair as far as entertainment goes.

I'd have thought those kids already have enough to contend with.

Learn English

Or at least learn the English way: do as I say and not as I do.

A recent report has called on immigrants to improve their proficiency in English.

Sajid Javid, the Communities Secretary, released a statement welcoming the Casey Review into the integration of recent migrants which warned of the 'lower levels of English language proficiency' among some communities.

Typos, year in and year out

Perhaps all the other Diaries have been sold and Now there's only one Available.

Sorry, Avalible.

Analyze this

The South Florida Sun-Sentinel newspaper appears to have invented a new word.

It certainly provides an alternative approach to delving deeply into something.

U R now out of Europe

Since the eighties, the Erasmus Programme has provided foreign exchange options for students from within the European Union.

The marketing people have clearly been impressed with the church banners that read

CH__CH

What's missing?

UR

So much so that they decided to use the same idea with their posters.

You'd think that, after 30 years of working in Europe, they'd at least be able to spell it.

Somewhere to shout about

I hope the soundproofing is up to the job.

Leaning or lending?

With the Autumn Statement due later today, the BBC has me wondering whether the Chancellor is planning on lending a bit of cash to Teresa or whether he expects her to cough up a little extra.

England in disarray

According to Sky Sports, and courtesy of Angie J, there was a degree of upset in England after the recent football match against Spain.

Poopermarket jobs

It's not clear whether these would be your weekly toilet break allowances or the average number of that type of customer you might encounter each week.

World Teachers' Day

If you can read this, thank a Techear.

Typo detector

Just when you thought it was all over, this typo has me wondering whether 'multiple lie-dictator' might have been a good description of Hillary's style of presidency had she won.

It's all Greek to me

Manchester City Council.

How can you justify using public funds to pay the type of person who can come up with something as shoddy as this?

Hillary and I

Before it all ends with a bang tomorrow, here's one last presidential typo as it appears on voting papers issued by the Election Commission of Lonoke County, Arkansas.

One voter claims that the addition of the extra i was a deliberate attempt to brand her chosen candidate a liar once the latest news broke concerning Hillary's emails.

Remember, remember

The 5th of November.

Or should that be the 3th?

Picture: Silverfernz/Reddit

What a difference a d makes

We have Ann F to thank for sending this one in.

We're still not sure whether it was Mrs Delaney or Mrs Anderson who suffered.

Who put the crack in crackers?

Aldi did.

At least, a so-called Graphic Designer did, with the hare-brained idea of mixing capital and lower case letters within words.

It's believed that Rosemary wasn't too happy with her box on display like that.

F for spelling

New York City Department of Education.

Shame on you.