Wednesday, 27 February 2013

Cheesed off

My initial reaction to this was: Whoa. Wait a minute. WTF?

Sainsbury's, you just have to be kidding me.


As if the possibility of buying horse meat balls wasn't enough to put you off these places, they now proudly present Knob Cheese.

That's just... No. No. No. You simply can't market a product with a name like that.

But actually, the 'product' is nowhere to be found on the Internet other than on Twitter and Facebook (thanks, John H) so I'm guessing it's a spoof. And, if you Google the term, you find... well, what you'd expect.

The give away? The missing apostrophe in Sainsbury's. Poor research on the spoofer's part, I'm afraid.

Funny picture though.

But the most disturbing thing about it, fake or otherwise?

It's all sold out.

Monday, 25 February 2013

Glosso-filial

Another blunder from the BBC subtitling team; this one via Twitter.

A screenshot of a father talking affectionately about his two sons.


Perhaps it's a quirky way of describing the younger lad's love of language.

Friday, 22 February 2013

Ooh, thorny

Thanks to Hil J for sending this one through.

It was posted on Twitter by Timothy Barber whose friend photographed it earlier this week in a River Island shop.

River Island

As Timothy tweets: Repellent sexism and incorrect grammar, all in one vile T-shirt package.

But it's for a man, so the thing that really offends him about the T-shirt is its low neckline.

Hopefully its sales will plunge in much the same way.

Wednesday, 20 February 2013

Monday, 18 February 2013

Bring back the sub

Thanks to Jon C for sending this one which he found via his iPad.


That's one catchy subtitle, guys.

Friday, 15 February 2013

Coughing

I needed to find some images of people coughing for a project.


I guess, instead of typing 'Coughing' in a Google image search, I must have made a massive typo of my own and somehow accidentally typed in 'How to practise oral sex'.

Try it here.

Coughing

Ahem.

Wednesday, 13 February 2013

Peachy pricing

Angie J has been grocery shopping typo spotting at Tesco again and, as on previous occasions, it wins top marks for shafting its customers.


Actually, shafting isn't the right word.

It's stealing from its customers.

Well, every little helps.

Helps Tesco, that is.

What a pleasant, upstanding and trustworthy company it is.

Monday, 11 February 2013

City College

Come on, Peterborough. Get a grip.

When you read this advert for City College (or Sh-tty College as it's known by some of the locals), you'll understand what Jon C is up against in his increasingly frustrating attempts to uphold standards in that otherwise very fine City.

The advert's sole purpose appears to be to showcase some of the worst examples of those English skills which it is offering to teach.


First, in the heading, why all the capitals? Oh, apart from the second 'to'.

And there's only one college so it should read 'College Offers' and not 'College Offer'.

So, in just one heading we are presented with errors in punctuation, grammar and consistency.

Let's carry on.

Oh, here we go again. Why the capitalisation? Apart from 'City' which earns only a capital initial letter.

And, unless those jobseekers are all taking part in the same job hunt, 'their job hunt' should be 'their job hunts'.

Again, there's only one College so City College has many years experience, not 'have' many years experience.

And, because there are many years and not just one year, there's a misplaced apostrophe. It should read 'many years' experience' and not 'many year's experience'.

Also, there should be a couple of commas in that sentence. One after Peterborough and the other after Street.

There you go, Jackie. You say 'The College has launched...' Despite the fact that you probably wrote the rest of the advert, your quote recognises, at last, that there is only one College. Well done.

Oops, I spoke too soon. I assume there is more than one employer in Peterborough. If that's the case then there's another misplaced apostrophe. It should read 'local employers' needs' and not 'local employer's needs'.

And there's no such word as 'likeminded'. It should be like-minded.

Then we have more inconsistency with some of the programme titles earning capital initial letters while others don't, followed by the Business Administration Course suddenly being promoted to capital initial status.

The quote from the student is clumsy but it might actually be a genuine quote so I'll not dwell on it.

Finally we get back to words provided, presumably, by the College. You can tell because the first sentence doesn't make sense. Instead of a full stop after 'available', there should be a comma and Phone should not have a capital initial letter. You couldn't possibly email www.citycollegepeterborough.co.uk because it's a web address and not an email address. You might visit it though.

Or, as the advert says, you could visit the College in person.

If you do, perhaps you'd like to help the members of staff with their English rather than vice versa.

Oh, and ask them if they're interested in running a course in Proofreading.

Friday, 8 February 2013

Whisky, Tango, Foxtrot?

Here's another of those WTF? articles courtesy, it would seem, of a weird and wonderful translation application.

Jon C is interested in The Quantified Self and came across the article in Cyprus Today.

Here's the headline to start you off.


Clue: for Assistance, read Help and for We, read Us. Once you've mastered the code, it all makes perfect sense.

Try your newly-found code-breaking skills on the opening paragraph.


Easy, yes?

It gets harder.


And harder.


Well, the author's correct there. I need to step divided from whatever I'm doing until I've calmed down after attempting that lot. So I'm going to have to say, 'I'm out.'

But, if you're up for more, you'll find the article here.

Don't say you weren't warned.

Wednesday, 6 February 2013

Keeping bussy

Thanks to Hil J for sending me this photo of a road sign he saw in Mid-Suffolk.

I've seen several signs with similar attempts at spelling the word but this, complete with its apostrophe that's not really sure whether it should be there, takes the biscuit.


As it states clearly that it's Open, I thought I'd try and find out exactly what this Bussinesse is.

It's not on its own. Can you believe there are 126,000 listings for Bussinesse on Google?

Including this page on Fiverr which actually has a category called Bussinesse.

And this fantastic blog whose title refers to something called bessiness yet posts under a Business heading every month before, in a bizarre twist, changing to the alternative style for the very latest post.

It's a strange world.

Monday, 4 February 2013

Trainign Day

Thanks to Angie J for sending me this one which she discovered in...


yes, a school planner.

I wonder when the Literacy Trainign Day is.

The Twelfht of Never?

Friday, 1 February 2013

Velveeta surprise

We can no longer buy Velveeta in the UK but, while I was researching the Lance Armstrong post, I came across this article on the Livestrong website.

I believe this picture shows Velveeta being used in a macaroni cheese dish. Or mac and cheese according to the article.

Photo Credit Jupiterimages/Comstock/Getty Images

However, it appears that Velveeta's rightful place is in your underwear.


The article doesn't make it clear whether its permanent home as a gooey product in your panties is before it's been consumed or after.

Ew. Perhaps that's what the writer means when she says it's time to dump the Velveeta.

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