Irish strike gold

Published in yesterday's The Journal.

You couldn't make it up.

It's not clear whether it was an air strike, a lightning strike or a shillelagh strike.

But that's the Irish for you.

Bless 'em.

BBC rhyming slang

As tweeted by @MrRandomSilly the other day, someone at BBC News will be in trouble.

I don't know why though.

Whoever wrote it was just saying what the rest of us already think about Bankers and their standards.

As if life isn't hard enough

Thanks are due to Clive Eaton who shared this photo on Twitter @CliveEaton..

Spotted in Leamington Spa, Warwickshire.

An irritating inconvenience. That's the entry for 'hassle' in my dictionary.

Clearly written with solicitors in mind.

Meanwhile, this from the company's About Us page on its website.

Blah, blah. Yeah, yeah. Shame your 'all-round skill-set' doesn't extend to typing correctly.
"

Oh, and this from the weekly WH update simply confirms those skill-set shortcomings.

Eh? Laywers? Affrodable? City of global firms?

Now that is irritating.

Oh Mr Woo

Uncovered in Washington, DC.

Missed it?

I'm not surprised. It's not that crear.

Bank Holiday Punday

The roundest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference who acquired his size from too much pi.

I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island, but it was an optical Aleutian.

She was only the whisky maker's daughter, but he loved her still.

A catapult was confiscated in an algebra class as it was a weapon of maths disruption.

The butcher backed into his bacon slicer and got a little behind with his orders.

No matter how much you push the envelope, it'll still be stationery.

A dog gave birth to puppies in the street and was arrested for littering.

A grenade thrown into a French kitchen would result in Linoleum Blownapart.

Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie.

Atheism is a non-prophet organisation.

Two hats hanging on a hat rack. One says to the other, 'You stay here; I'll go on a head.'

A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.

The short fortune-teller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large.

The man who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.

A backward poet writes inverse.